What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
Randomize
