I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
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