I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
