yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize