But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
Your topless pictures make me question reality
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
A+ Viking dick
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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