A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
Randomize
