hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
Randomize
