I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
