I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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