People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
i think i just lost a toe
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
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