Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
My life is pants optional.
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