I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
Randomize
