Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Randomize
