the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
I've been alternating between telling people I was mauled by a bear or hit by a car to explain the massive unexplainable bruise on my leg. Slightly more worried now that the car idea is believable.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Randomize
