it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
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