There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
Randomize
