Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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