My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
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