sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
Randomize
