Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
I woke up at 5am on my couch, naked, with a cereal bowl of water next to me. Apprently, drunk me thought I was a kitten last night. Super impressed I slept next to the bowl all night and didn't spill a drop.
Randomize
