So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize