Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
Love you...
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
