so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
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