I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
What happened to fro yo and sex?
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
