this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
