so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
Turns out that my surprise "happy birthday" drop-in for my dad turned into a "my parents like afternoon sex a lot" realization.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
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