Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
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