theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
i think im in europe. pls send help
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
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