In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
I have already put on my inside pants.
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
