I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
How many fucks given?
0.12846
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
Randomize