i already hear my dad disowning me
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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