Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Randomize
