No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
