Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
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