So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
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