if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
I currently don't understand fingers.
Randomize