also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
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