dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
I looked at my own cervix.
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
Randomize
