i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
I seem to have left my pride at pride
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Randomize
