we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
Randomize
