I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
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