And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
