google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize
