Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
he was CRYING into my vagina
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
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