im gay
i know
yea but for you.
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
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