It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
I need mimosas to revive my soul
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
