No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
The chlamydia really affected his face.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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