Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
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