Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
The sky will open, cue choir of angels: "oh! wow! Matt was right! Not only will I grow out my bush, but I'm going to date straight, available men!"
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
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