i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Randomize
