why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
Pants 0. Shit 1.
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
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