I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
If you think hives from an allergic reaction to lube is funny, remind me to tell you the story about how I got a black eye from masturbating.
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
Randomize
